


The Rip

by spellboundreader316



Series: Susan's Purpose [2]
Category: Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types
Genre: Bad Decisions, Emotional Hurt, Emotions, Gen, Not Beta Read, Pre-Book: The Last Battle (Narnia), Selfish Susan, Susan Pevensie Never Forgot, The Problem of Susan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-21
Updated: 2018-03-21
Packaged: 2019-04-06 05:47:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14050245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spellboundreader316/pseuds/spellboundreader316
Summary: Susan's decision to choose parties over her family has its consequences.





	The Rip

Entertaining others had always come naturally to Susan. Maybe it was just years of practice in court, but Susan excelled at putting on a smile and saying exactly what someone wanted to hear. For this reason, she had only needed the one favor from Jane to secure herself a place on the guest list of all the major parties.

And it felt good. Sure, everyone was still shallow and stuck up, but it felt like, for Susan, that she had a place where she fit in again.

None of the others understood. Peter was in school, fast-tracking his way to greatness. He couldn’t understand how she could enjoy doing something so beneath her potential. Edmund, always concerned with what was right, was upset at her for wasting so much money on selfish things. But Lucy—Lucy was the hardest to bear. She had twisted something Susan had said and was now convinced that Susan had completely forgotten Narnia. She wasn’t entirely wrong; there were some things Susan had chosen to put out of her mind, but to believe that she could outright forget almost half her life was absurd. However, believe Lucy did, and her heartbreak had driven a wedge between them.

Susan told herself that she didn’t care. That she was happy, and if her siblings couldn’t be happy for her, then their opinions didn’t matter. But it did matter, and it hurt so much in the private places she would never show anyone. If she cared to think about it, and most of the time she didn’t, but when she did, she could remember them being proud of her. The approval in Peter’s eyes when she proposed laws that had been thought out and written for the good of everyone involved. The joy in Edmund’s smile when they had opened the first orphanage. The excitement that shone out of Lucy when they decided to travel somewhere.

Even back in this world there had been moments when they had gladly supported her. When she won a swimming competition, for example, or when she went to America with Mother and Father.

But they had grown up again. An unlike before, this time they had grown apart as well. Susan didn’t mind—not really. In fact, she encouraged it. She hadn’t corrected Lucy when she thought Susan was forgetting Narnia. Instead, she had planned a party during the next gathering of the “Friends of Narnia,” and the next, and the one after that. She had stopped taking time to listen to Peter talk about what he was learning. She had even stopped donating to whatever Edmund’s current cause was.

She got a job. It wasn’t much, but it let her leave home. Susan could tell herself that she was moving on, growing up. That was what she wanted—sometimes.

Most of the time nowadays, Susan didn’t know what she wanted. What had started this whole mess was her desire to be less grown up, but whenever the family got together, it was a source of pride to try and be the most “grown-up” out of her siblings. Nothing made sense anymore. Not that it had been all that clear before. In fact, Susan felt just as lost as ever. Her siblings all seemed to have a calling, a reason for being, but all she had was what amounted to the leftover, loose change from somebody else’s life.

So, Susan painted on a smile and went to parties because even if she was lost, at least she wasn’t alone. Take that Aslan!


End file.
